It hit me again, and this time worse than ever! But I was just coming up to the hospital, so I pulled in at the "Emergency" sign, parked and ran in through the open door.

To the receptionist I said: "Quick! A stabbing pain inside my rear end."

"In there and ask for the doctor on call," she said.

I made for the door she pointed to and told a nurse what was wrong. She took me into a cubicle and started me undressing, then went off to get the doctor.

I'd got out of my clothes by the time she came back with him: about thirty five, dark and strong professional eyes.

"What's the problem?" he asked.

"Doctor, I've terrible stabbing pains inside my rear end!"

"Had this before?"

"Yes, but never as bad . . . "

"Get up on the exam table here... kneel and put your chest down on the table, bottom in the air! Right! Now I'm putting on a latex glove with KY, and we'll just feel inside . . . relaaaax, now . . . There! That's good. Veeery goood!...." and his finger slid all around inside me, probing . . .

"You don't seem to have any damage in there; the walls of your rectum feel sound."

"What I'd like you to do is this: we are a teaching hospital, as you know. The professor of diagnostic medicine is looking for a rectal case to show his class on their hospital rounds this morning."

"I would like you to volunteer to be the patient so with you he can teach his students how to perform a thorough rectal examination."

"If you agree, your diagnostic tests will be far more complete than we ever have time for in the Emergency Room! What do you say? Can I send you for the Prof's class teaching rounds?"

"Oh! Yes, please, doctor!"

"Great! You will be helping the future of Medicine, too, this way! Nurse, put a hospital gown on her and take her in a wheelchair with her clothes to Nurse Rosebud on the fifth floor with this note. Rosebud will prepare her for the professor's rounds. Thanks again! and good luck!," as he left the cubicle.

We trailed along corridors and up in an elevator, until I was handed over to Nurse Rosebud along with the note from the doctor in the Emergency Room.

"I'm so glad you've come! We have no rectal cases in the hospital at the moment, and Professor Pendragon needs one this morning for his diagnostic students' rounds."

"What's your name?"

"Kathy Pidlington,"

"Just sign this Release, Kathy, then we'll get going with prepping you."

"Good! We'll put your clothes in this locker, shoes too! Now, I need you up on this padded table, kneeling with your chest down on the table, bottom up in the air."

"I'm going to give you an enema with soft soap in it then more enemas with plain warm water, = until you are squeaky clean inside."

And that's just what Nurse Rosebud did do . . . she gave me enemas until it felt as though my insides were all water!

"No time to spare! The rounds get here in less than an hour!"

When at last she said: "There! You're all ready now! Stand while I dry your back. Now I want you to lie with your back on the table. No, don't bother with your hospital gown. They want you without clothes of any kind!"

"Now, just to steady you, I'll put this soft wide leather strap across your chest, above your breasts and down under your arms. So! Now I want you to lift your left leg so it is straight up in the air and let me pull it over and fasten it down here next to your head!"

"Now the other leg, up and over to fasten it beside your right ear! Good thing you have flexible joints!"

"With your bottom like his, pointing up to the ceiling, the students will point their hands downward to enter your rectum."

"Hands . . . Enter !! ??" What on earth have I got myself into ?

"I'll detach the lower end of the table and remove it so they can stand right next to your bottom."

"Next thing, I need to dilate you so their hands will enter you! The enemas have relaxed you a bit, and this little gizmo will easily slide in."

Saying which, she gently pressed into my bottom a thing with a rounded tip, like a cone that got bigger and bigger as it went in . . . Nurse Rosebud turned the cone while she pressed it into my bottom . . . then pulled it out, then back down again while she turned it . . .

Stretched ? I felt as if I was being torn apart!! I grunted and groaned, but the straps held me firmly. At last she stopped pressing down and pulled the cone out and read the marks on it:

"That's good! You've done well, Kathy! An inch and a half!! Well, that's where we'll start with this dilator." and she slid into my bottom a metal cylinder, only as she explained: "There's a knob on the end that I can turn here. It puts tension on the wall of the cylinder, to make it larger. It doesn't force you at all; it only gets bigger just as fast as you let it!"

"Now, I've got just moderate tension on. How does that feel, Kathy?"

"Feels OK so far . . ."

"Good I'll let it work for a bit and see how we get on . . ."

"Hmmm! That tension has been working for five minutes now, and not much effect. I'll jack up the tension some more, and leave it another five minutes . . ."

This time I really did feel the thing working: it was as if fingers were pulling hard all round my anus to open it wider and wider and . . .

I shouted that it was hurting me, but all Nurse Rosebud said was: "Hush now! The pain soon passes ." and she checked that the door was firmly closed!

Funny thing was, I didn't know whether it was actually making my opening bigger or not . . .

Nurse Rosebud said: "That's better! You really are opening up very nicely now! I'll give it some more tension . . ."

And I could feel it pulling the lips of my anus even more strongly . . and I was groaning again . . . I felt like a prisoner, helpless to escape and being tortured on the rack!

I could hear voices approaching, and Nurse Rosebud said: "I think we've just made it in time! Here they come . . ."

In walked Professor Pendragon followed by some student doctors (I supposed!) all in white coats and stethoscopes round their necks . .

"Our next case this morning is here in Room 13, and we'll call her "Room 13" in our usual way!"

"Gather round the examination table. Room 13 has her shoulders flat on the table, with a strap to hold them there, and her legs are thrown up and over to be held by straps at the table beside her head.

"We are interested in Room 13's rectum: She presents complaining of a sharp pain in there."

"Most textbooks say to examine the patient in the knee-chest position with her bottom up in the air. This overlooks the most important sign to look for in these cases, however, which is the look in the patient's eyes as you probe inside her rectum. As you look down between her legs at her face. This position you see reveals far more to the examining doctor than the knee-chest position!"

"The straps are, unfortunately, necessary as patients occasionally change their minds about undergoing this procedure, which is of course only for their own good. But some have been known to doubt this in no uncertain terms, as they jump down from the table shouting things like: "You're a bunch of dirty old men!" "Just enjoying yourselves!" and using Billingsgate language.".

"You see a dilator in the rectum of Room 13. Nurse Rosebud here has taken about two hours to dilate 13's anus to its present opening about three inches across."

"Some of you look surprised! We must remember that when we perform an operation on the rectum under anesthetic, we routinely expand the opening to this size: it is the largest that the bone structure allows."

"For an operation, we perform this dilation under an anesthetic; But the patient can remain fully conscious while her anus is being stretched, as long as it is done slowly."

"Any hurry in the procedure can be most painful to the patient, so it should never be rushed, unless there is a punitive reason such as an uncooperative or insulting patient. Tell me, 13, has Nurse Rosebud hurt you at all this morning?"

"No, doctor! She has been most careful not to hurt me!" That wasn't true at all! She'd hurt like Hell! But that would be a no-win remark

"Good! Now, Nurse, will you please remove the dilator!"

"Jocelyn, you have the smallest hand of anyone! Please don a latex glove and lubricate it with plenty of KY. Now, put your fingers together so they make a pyramid, and touch them onto 13's anus. Right, now move your hand in a circular path so your fingers press into her anus from different angles, and press down gently into her all the time."

"This is where you need to watch 13's eyes! Look down between her legs at her face. You may need to cause pain for your hand to enter, but you don't do that if you can avoid it! Unless, again, you wish to cause pain for this patient."

"In your lectures in Patient Billing you will have heard that if you plan to charge $200 or more for a procedure, the patient will be more ready to accept the charge without argument if you have hurt them . And you can gauge the pain you are giving by the patient's eyes."

"Now your hand has slid into 13's rectum quite easily, hasn't it, Jocelyn ?"

"This is because the sphincter muscles of the anus remain stretched for at least an hour after the stretching first occurred "

"Jocelyn, take your hand out of 13's rectum now please and let John get the feel of a rectal examination next."

"Your hand is a bit larger than Jocelyn's, John. Watch 13's eyes carefully as you push down and slide your hand in!"

"It's difficult to tell sometimes whether the patient's eyes are showing pain, or "Stop it . . . I like it!" or just plain eye-popping ecstasy "

"But always remember, you are making a medical examination, not making a social call!"

"That's good, John! Right in up to your wrist! Patricia, you do it next. You'll all find that your hands slip in easier and easier as time goes on and more insertions are made into 13."

"The rectum quickly begins to produce its own lubricant, that helps the person who is sliding things in and out, just as the vagina does during sexual intercourse. The human body is constructed for sexual intercourse per anum, as much as per vaginam, as I'm sure most of you already know "

"Patricia, now your hand is right inside 13's rectum, begin gently to close your hand into a fist. Watch her eyes! Are you hurting her at all?"

"I don't see any pain there, doctor! It looks more like sexual excitement to me."

"Right! Now Patricia, turn your fist round inside 13's rectum! Pain?"

"No doctor; greater excitement, I'd say!"

"Good! Now slowly unclench your fist, because it's too large to withdraw through 13's anus, and take your hand out of her rectum."

"Tom, I've kept you until last! Your hand is the largest of anyone's! Latex glove and plenty of KY! And watch 13's eyes closely! Your big hand will have to push 13's sphincter muscles, her whole anal complex, up into her bottom before there's room for your hand to go through the confined opening in her bone structure."

"Pushing her anus up into her rectum like this, pulls on the skin from the cheeks of her bottom. So you have more manipulation to do than the others before your hand can enter 13's rectum!"

"Just take it steady and watch 13's eyes closely! Rock your hand gently from side to side! Right! Now that your hand is completely down inside her rectum, notice all of you that 13's rectum has stretched without difficulty to accommodate Tom's great muscular hand inside her."

"Now, carefully Tom, make a fist inside 13's rectum. Is 13 suffering pain?"

"Looks excited, just like with Patricia! Not pain."

"Now Tom, slowly turn your fist through a half circle inside 13's rectum, so your knuckles press into the wall of her vagina and go "bump-bump-bump" past her G-spot. Do you see pain?"

"Approaching orgasm, I'd say!"

"That is inevitable with this movement of your knuckles! In a woman you play tunes on her G- spot; in a man you are thumping on his prostate. It'll be only kind for you to bring her to completion using the same movement of your knuckles against her G-spot It usually helps to press gently on her clitoris too, but I'm sure I don't need to tell you that."

I was shouting my head off in wild ecstasy with Tom's knowing action with the knuckles of his fist inside my rectum.

They banged like a huge knobly dildo against my sensitive sex centers next to my cunny as he turned his tight-fitting fist inside me first one way then the other . . . and he was stroking my clit as he did this.

I jerked in spasms as I exploded in an ecstatic orgasm that seemed to go on for minutes . . .

"No problem with you billing the patient after that! Good . . . I do like to hear a patient in full- throated orgasm."

"Now take your hand out Tom, carefully!"

"I want to know your diagnoses for the sharp pain of 13 in her rectum Joclyn?"

"I felt nothing in her rectum to account for it! I'd send 13 for X-ray."

"John?"

I agree: X-ray!"

"Patricia?"

"I found nothing to account for pain in 13's rectum. I'd get a CAT scan, rather than X-ray, of rectum and vagina."

"Tom?"

"None of us has made 13 cry out in pain while we four have been using her rectum, in and out, like a trouser pocket! I think 13 will leave us fully cured; no further treatment needed!"

"She came simply to enjoy having several student doctors examine her, and no further action is called for on our part."

"You're uncommonly shrewd, Tom! Yes, I needed a willing "patient" so you could all actually experience how to dilate a rectum without anesthetic, then learn to examine the patient while watching her eyes for pain at every step."

"And we actually got ourselves an anal sybarite! Nothing wrong with her rectum . . . she came to the Emergency Room out of wanton desire!"

"Watch for this syndrome when you go into practice, too More people than you might suspect simply enjoy this type of exam! Women and men, both! Billing, say, $200 is not a bad return on your time, though. And you earn the undying gratitude of your patient."

"If you happen to meet with 13 socially, you will be sure to recognize each other after this session of looking intently into each other's eyes! and you may enjoy each other's company again. Thank you, 13."

And he smacked me friendly but hard on my bottom as he walked out.

Seeing this, the four students all slapped me hard on my butt too as they walked out of Room 13, grinning and saying: "Thank you 13!" or "See you again, 13!" as they trooped out and on to their next patient.

Tom was exactly right, of course. When I said at the start: "It hit me again, and this time worse than ever!", what had hit me again was a sudden urge to have someone slide their finger in and out of my rectum.

No question: today had been an all-time best.