This weekend, I spent some time 'roaming the stacks' of the diaper stories that are kept on-line. Most seemed to center on being 'turned' into a baby. This, unfortunately, does nothing for me. I have no desire to be treated like a baby. Made to wear diapers as punishment or just because my girlfriend wants me to, no problem! Anyway, I thought I would write a few ideas down. If this story does nothing for you, I'm sorry, maybe what your looking for is in one of the archives that can be found via the Web. Also, it may become apparent that English grammar is not my strong suit (dammit Jim, I'm a Scientist, not a English Professor!).
I started wearing diapers again when I was twelve or so. I know it was during the summer just prior to seventh grade that I first started experimenting with diapers. I didn't exactly feel like I wanted to be a baby, it was more like it was fun to get away with something that I wasn't supposed to do. Given the fact that the diapers I used to wear were rather bulky, there was always the chance that someone would notice the bulge and confront me with the embarrassing fact that I was in diapers. I used to fantasize about begging caught in this way and then forced to wear diapers, either to hide the secret that I really didn't need them or as a punishment. Needless to say, I really never expected it to happen for real, and when it did, I found that the old adage "Be careful what you wish for..." was very true.
I had been sneaking or buying diapers on and off all that summer without incident. When school started, however, I was too afraid of being caught to wear diapers during the day. My diaper escapades were limited to the weekends and nighttime. What I hadn't calculated on was that while I was at school, my mom was going through my things. She found my diapers on several occasions and would confront me. She had (correctly) assumed that I was just wearing diapers for some weird adolescent perversion and therefore didn't make too much of a fuss. Her reasoning was that it was normal for children reaching puberty to try to find some sort of an outlet for their newly found sexual desires. Therefore, all I would get was a speech about what other people would think seeing me in diapers (as in the old peer pressure argument), and then be told she didn't want to catch me wearing diapers again. She each time she confronted me, she would ask if I was wearing a diaper, to which about fifty percent of the time I had to say yes. Even then, she never made me take off the diaper, but she would always confiscate my "supplies".
Anyway, along comes winter break. I spent the whole two weeks in diapers without being caught once! When the Monday came to return to school, I don't know if I was feeling horny or that I had gotten so used to wearing diapers that I didn't think, but I wore a diaper to school for the first time. I remember getting out of bed, pulling my pants over my diapers and then carrying on from there without giving what I was wearing much thought. It really didn't hit me until the bus was pulling into the schoolyard that I was now stuck all day in a diaper whether I wanted to or not. This was a new experience since I had almost always been able to take off my diaper when the need arose. Not only was I stuck in a diaper, but I had to walk, sit, and play next to many other people. Any one of whom could alert everyone to what I was wearing, and that thought kept me on edge all day long. When school was finally out, I was so relieved and all I wanted was to get home and out of diapers! I didn't touch another diaper for quite awhile. Then, I started thinking about that day and began to get excited and I found I actually liked the anticipation and humiliation I felt while actually being "stuck" in a diaper.
I started getting bolder and bolder wearing diapers in public and even more so at school. I would stuff my already thick disposable diaper with some cloth diapers I found stored at home. I would also wear shirts that I knew would ride up above the top of my jeans and diapers, showing all the world about an inch or two of gleaming white diaper! I knew some people at least knew what I was wearing, but to my surprise, nobody teased me or even said anything to my face about it. That was until the day that I was wearing not only a thick diaper and a short tee-shirt, but I also had on white shorts that, though I didn't realize it until later, were translucent enough to show everything! I might as well have been wearing just a diaper to school!
Nothing had happened until second period when I had physical education. We had all finished our stretching exercises and running laps. After running I almost always had to go to the bathroom, so I went and asked Mrs. Blue, the PE teacher, if I could run over and use the restroom. She looked down and, making sure nobody was too close to overhear her, asked me if I had a bladder problem. I instantly knew what she was driving at and therefore denied everything (keep in mind I didn't realize everyone could see my diaper). She just shrugged her shoulders and told me that unless I had a note from my doctor, I couldn't go. I was so uncomfortable that I couldn't play anything during our "free time" during the last half hour of class. Mrs. Blue noticed how uncomfortable I was and came over to see what was wrong. I told her I really had to go to the bathroom and that it was hurting to hold it in. She gave me a puzzled look and asked why I didn't just use my diaper. I was shocked hearing the words spoken out loud and immediately denied I was wearing one. She just reached over and pulled the leg of my shorts tight and pointed out the fact that she could see my diaper right through the material. I didn't know what to say and therefore... I lied. I told her that I had been having trouble wetting the bed and my pants. I had started wearing diapers because I felt more comfortable in a wet diaper than a wet bed or clothes. She noticed the flaw in my story and pounced, pointing out that I seemed to be holding on just fine at the moment. Thinking fast again, I pointed out that it was taking everything in me to keep from wetting myself. I also pointed out (and prided myself on my quick thinking) that if I wet myself this early in the day, I would really smell bad by the end of the day. When she asked why I didn't bring an extra diaper or two just in case, I said that I couldn't because my mom didn't know, and that trying to slip an extra diaper out of the house was just too risky. She seemed to buy it because she let me go to the bathroom. She also told me that if I didn't make it to come back and tell her.
At this point I was very embarrassed, very nervous, and wondering what I had just done. I suspected that she was keeping and eye on me as I was walking to the boys restroom. Had I just gone and done my duty, that probably would have been the end of it. Except for the fact I would have spent the rest of the day knowing everyone could see my diaper. I then made the decision that I would keep up the act (and regret it). I walked slower and slower, trying to wet my diaper as I walked. I never wet my diaper before so this was a very difficult feat. All I could get was a small trickle, so I stopped walking and really concentrated. Within moments my bladder was empty and my diaper was soaked. I was about three-quarters of the way to the bathroom and just turned around and headed back to class. When I turned and looked up, I saw that Mrs. Blue had indeed been watching me, and by the look of pity on her face, knew what had happened.
She had me sit on a bench while she went and told her assistant that "Ken wet his diaper" and that she was taking me to the office. Given the fact I was sitting farther away from her than some of my classmates were playing, I knew at least some of them heard her. We walked into the office and I was taken into the nurse's office (the school didn't have a nurse (cutbacks) but they did have a infirmary of sorts). I had to sit there while she went and called my mom and told the principal what happened. All that kept going through my head was "What have I done?" and "I am dead meat when mom gets here!".
By the time Mrs. Blue returned with the principal, I was so worked up that I was physically shaking. They tried to calm me down by reassuring me that I had nothing to be ashamed of. They also told me that they explained the situation to my mom and that she was going to call the doctor to make an appointment before bringing me dry clothes. The principal, Mr. Bush, also tried to pick up my spirits by pointing out that few kids would have thought, or had the guts, to try to control this "problem" by wearing diapers. After a few minutes, I was beginning to calm down. By the time my mom arrived, I was almost back to normal. My mom walked in with a brown bag that I assumed held my underwear and maybe some other outer clothes. I was very surprised when she handed me the bag and told me she had to almost ransack my room to find them and that she had to stop at the store for a roll of tape before coming. She also told me that I had a doctor's appointment in the morning and, after giving me a hug, told me that I should have said something the first time she caught me. I was dumbstruck! She actually believed I was wearing diapers because I had to? Worse yet, she expected me to change my diaper here? I had expected to be taken home for the day, given what happened and all. My mom then told me that she was going to go grocery shopping and that she would pick me up after school so I didn't have to ride the bus home.
After she left, Mrs. Blue handed me a plastic bag and told me to put my dirty diaper in it and leave it on the bed I was sitting on. She and the Mr. Bush left me sitting there after pulling the curtain around the bed so I could change in privacy. It took me a few minutes to change and I had found that my mom didn't just bring me a diaper, she brought all the diapers that I had made. I say made because they were actually three toddler diapers taped side to side (this is before elastic-leg hourglass-shaped diapers became widespread). The seams were made as close as possible to the crotch area so that, when the diaper is put on, all of the front seam and most the rear seam were hidden. Not only that, but I would use clear tape to hide the seams even more. The overall effect was a thick, white, toddler looking diaper. I slipped my shorts back on and looked in the mirror. Not only was the bulk of my diaper obvious, but Mrs. Blue was right, everyone could see right through my shorts! I was beginning to get nervous again, knowing I was going to have to go back to class with my diaper showing. Before I left I asked the principal (Mrs. Blue had left to see to her class) what I should do with my extra diapers. He took the bag and wrote my name on it! He then took it back to the nurses office and stored it under a counter. He told me that if I have another accident all I have to do is tell the secretary in the office and come in here and change. I thanked him and nervously turned to leave. Seeing how nervous I was, he told me not to worry that he was sure everyone would understand. He was right, I was very nervous and afraid as I headed for class. I wanted nothing more than to sneak in and hide behind the safety of my desk. Unfortunately, lunch period had just started, which meant that I was going to have to stand in line, exposed to everyone who looks down. Then I was going to have to be outside in the bright sun that seemed to only highlight the diaper under my shorts.
Once I finished eating (I couldn't eat much because of my nervousness), I went outside and tried to avoid everyone. Several of my friends found me, and to my surprise, nobody mentioned anything about diapers. Even though I did notice a couple of them glancing down at my diaper whenever they thought I wasn't looking.
I stood waiting for my mom to pick me up awhile after all the buses had left. The entire time all I could do is fidget with my shirt and jacket trying my best to conceal my diaper which I'd swear kept getting bulkier during the day. When my mom finally drove up, I climbed in and noticed in the back seat a large bag of disposable diapers nestled among the bags of groceries, with the words "extra thick" and "nighttime" printed on the side. Mom asked if I was dry and I shook my head yes. As we drove home the same words kept going through my head, 'What have I done?'