Medical Examination with a New Partner

This is a question that has been going through my head a few days. And the question is meant as a real-life question. No fantasy or make-believe, no play scenario or anything. Strictly for a real situation.

I was wondering if anyone ever experienced meeting someone, being attracted to them in a sexual way, but deciding for any number of practical or prudent reasons, if it might not be best for both to have a medical exam focusing on sexual issues like std's and such, before actually going over to serious intimacies?

I know that many sexual contacts are initiated in the heat of the moment, without much forethought. But still. There are certainly situations where a couple feels the growing (or instant!) attraction, but has to or decides to postpone actual physical intimacy until after having had a medical exam. I know that discussing such things is not usually on the agenda between new partners. It could possibly ruin the short and long-term prospect of a sexual relationship or might be construed as a sort of (parliamentary) motion of (non) confidence. But then again, I am sure that there are people who have the character and confidence to broach this subject before any possible intimacies.

And have possibly been the better off for it, by showing trust in each other and being willing to reveal possible problems or counter-indications or temporary measures to be taken. For instance if one of the prospective partners was more promiscuous previously than the other, even serially monogamously, that could still be a possible medical issue to contend with in the form of a possible latent std.

I was just wondering if anyone here has ever experienced this in real life. In a way I have a feeling that it would be a wonderful way to show confidence in and commitment to each other. And even - if I dare to suggest this in a medfet forum - by agreeing in the spirit of openness to getting the exam together.

Now maybe this last is a bit too much to expect, but in a way I do see it happening between the right people.

So, again, I was wondering if anyone has ever actually, truly and well and in real-life, ever experienced or done this? I would really wish to know.

Remember, no fantasy stuff please - that I am an ace in myself, at conjuring up fantasies and little theaters of the mind - 😃 I would only like to hear about real-life experiences of this sort or possible advice on how to bring up the subject.

The closest to this I experienced was forty years ago.

Back then to get a marriage license you had to have a blood test for STD'S.

As I was new to the community we went to my wife’s GP.

We were in the exam room together and the nurse took the blood sample.

The closest to this I experienced was forty years ago.

Back then to get a marriage license you had to have a blood test for STD'S.

Ah yes, that's right. I remember that in some states it was mandatory. Thanks for reminding me.

I was mainly thinking of a voluntary mutual check-up along with blood-work (which probably be enough in most situations anyway I suppose). I know it might be awkward in most situations. but on the other hand it also shows a willingness to trust each other and being prepared to go through some sensitive and delicate personal issues for mutual benefit.

And moreover, hey, who knows, it might be a way to indicate an interest in the erotic aspects of medical activities to each other. Why, even an open and frank and personal discussion could be arousing in a certain way I would imagine ... 😃

I insist that my sexual partners be checked regularly and I follow the same standard - 6 months unless there's a reason for more. Maybe I'm naive, but I trust them when they say they are clear.

As the exam includes a physical portion, it would be rather cool to observe each other's session. Maybe even have the doctor provide a 'tour.'

Yes, some people have mutual exams just for that reason with their GP.

I insist that my sexual partners be checked regularly and I follow the same standard - 6 months unless there's a reason for more.

Could you possibly go into more specifics?

For instance I suppose 'insist' is shorthand for a politely worded conversation on the advantages for both on being regularly examined? I guess once the topic is broached it should be easy enough to get through the idea without it being too awkward or sounding too paranoid or mistrustful. But then, how does one broach such a subject?

Any good examples of opening lines or arguments to use, what kind of setting, at what stage of getting to know one another? To put it in conservatively polite terms, I doubt it would be a subject on a first date.

Obviously a lot depends on partners and their attitudes. But it's not always possible to gauge how a potential partner might react. The possibilities for serious faux pas are almost endless I'd think ... ha ha.

I believe in honest communication surrounding relationships. I want to discuss likes and dislikes before either of us are offended or disappointed. If we are to be monogamous, I expect protected sex until we both have a clean exam. Insist = no, I won't do that or expect you to do that without a barrier or I won't engage in that at all until....

In general, communication makes better sex. Communicating about general and sexual health is part of that. I'm diabetic. I want a partner to understand in advance that getting up to eat in the middle of sex or play isn't a snub, it's a necessity for heath.

I work at an STI clinic and we routinely have new couples come in to get checked out together. With both straight and gay couples it is usually when they want to ditch the condoms and take the relationship to the next level. With straight couples it is usually the female that drags the male in for their check up. We ask allot of detailed questions and sometimes there are surprises that the love birds didn't know about each other terms of number of sexual partners or past history of STI.

In terms of the physical exam sometimes the women giggle when I am examining her mans genitals or doing the urethral swab, the female exam is all under a drape and from where the "guest" chair is located beside the exam table the guy cant see anything although sometimes the two of them make faces at each other. In terms of the gay's usually they find it a bit more no big deal and just part of routine dating life for there demographic. But ya we do allot of exams together at the patients request.