Desperate but how do I ask?

So I recently discovered this site so I thought I would join to seek advice and talk to those with a mutual intetest. I recently told my spouse that I have a medfet...didnt tell him how long I've known this and I'm glad he didn't ask cuz like...forever. However...theres only a couple other things that get me off medfet wise but it's really just all stethplay that I want...

So recently I've been desperate to do this. To have sessions. To fill this hole (no pun intended) that I've been missing for a long time. I just sit here night after night and read posts here wishing I could have a night like a lot of people have on here.

I know my spouse would be supportive BUT I also know he wouldn't know what to do and would find it odd...like idk if this makes sense but since I like to steth both ways I wish he would enjoy me doing it but I also long for someone to do this to me because it gets them off...not just because I asked him to...

I would love to meet someone and set up a session but since for me it's so built up and sexual I would be so scared I'd make a huge mistake and not keep it in my pants haha

Any thoughts or ideas?? Thanks!

Also- I'm 26 F

First of all: welcome to zity.biz!

There are a few steth-lovers and a huge number of med-fetters around here, so you'll certainly have a chance to talk to like-minded people.

You're also not alone with your question "how do I get my partner to share my fetish". Please browse the forum, it's a topic that's been discussed before! In general it's hard to give advice here, because there's no universal recipe, "one size fits all" as it were doesn't do the trick.

Only so much - be patient, open, communicative and respectful with your spouse. Other than that - you've come to a great community, all the best here and in your relationship! Great to have you on board.

Hi and welcome to Zity!

Well, you took the first step in telling your husband, but you didn't state his reaction. I would talk more with him about it, maybe show him some stories or videos of things that turn you on. Get a steth and experiment with it together. He might not become a medfet kinkster, but many things will turn a spouse on, just because of how the other spouse is reacting!

I would hate for you to start off by cheating on your husband, without really trying with him. And even if you don't have sex with a play doc, you are meeting someone, engaging in activity that turns you on, and hiding it from you husband. That's cheating.

You are young; many of us never knew about out fetishes until much later in life. Give your husband a chance.

Good luck!

Welcome to Zity Biz. Good luck with your quest.

Thank you 😃

As for his reaction- he said "oh ok. That's fine we should do research and watch some porn to findout what you like". Which was a wonderful reaction! But I just want to sit and steth for hours and I'm not sure how to say "hey I really am just a cardiophile." Again, my biggest thing is I want a man to take control and be Dr purely because it's his thing too. I know he's so understanding and would let me do it because he loves me but he's a silly boy so things don't always click ;-)

I think a lot of guys don't get a female's interest in fetishes right away -- especially if he was never exposed to the idea before. I didn't realize that some women like to play in a variety of ways, or like rough sex, etc. Now I do.Now I understand that some have held unrealized fantasies for years, and even decades.

Gonna tell him tonight! So nervous. Ironically my heart feels like it's going to burst. Just went for a run to try to get rid of the jitters and bring my HR back to normal :-P

Good luck! And give him some time to get used to it. Let him know how important this is to you and that you want to share these very personal, sexual, and intimate activities with him, because he is your husband and you love him.

And of course, volunteer that you want to know any kinks or interests HE may have, as you want to do things to please him as well!

The simple short of it is as follows............you don't ask, you don't get. So don't be afraid to ask for what you want.

Mashie

Dopescope, stething is pretty benign. Tell your hubby what you like. It's not like you're telling him you like to shoot water up your butt. (If you stay on Zity for long, you may find you like that, also.)

Jimmyt44- I was about to post almost those exact words.

You could also try the 'lesser of two evils' technique-

Tell him you want to do something way on the high end of the 'That's so kinky it's downright perverted' scale.

When he calms down, suggest stething. He'll be glad to comply.

Totaly told him and he is already thinking of things we can do 😃 he asked me what kind of steth i would want so im guessing hes already buying me one haha! He said I can listen to him literally any time I want 😃 so not what I was expecting! I feel like a new person!

Congrats, enjoy yourself, and hope he enjoys it too.

That wasn't so hard was it? 😃

Great news. Have fun!

I wouldn't suggest doing anything that implies infidelity. Why. It opt for the real thing? Many minute clinics are opening and large companies have a medical office. Having a brief listen by a professional is better than nothing.

If that fails, you could buy a high quality stethescope and go solo. Undress, lay down and steth yourself with one hand.

Many minute clinics are opening and large companies have a medical office. Having a brief listen by a professional is better than nothing.

Please don't anyone do this. I don't imagine there is any health care system in the world that has the time to cater to kinksters who want to get off on an exam. Those VERY limited resources are for people that really NEED medical attention. If your insurance covers it, then we are all paying for it. Even if you pay 100% out of pocket, then you are wasting their time which could be better spent helping sick people.

I would certainly second that. Don't waste the valuable time of medical professionals.

Find a play doctor, there are many here on Zity Biz.

Thanks- as stated before I did tell him and he is on board 😃 I still chat on here and hbp but that's it. The real fun is with him lol.

I have regular Dr appt so I go 2 times a week for other things but I do not find clinics and any serious medical appointments kinky. Having a brain tumor is always a serious thing and never a kink when I go in 😃

My hb kink is always at home.